Full Moon
by SemperFi-NavyNCIS
Summary: We all know what the period of New Moon was like for Bella but how did the Cullen's feel during those months?
1. Birthday

**This is New Moon from the point of view of the Cullen's. **

**Just so everyone is aware I am not a Rosalie hater, on the contrary I love her, as it may seem in this chapter but this is just how I imagine her reaction to Bella's birthday party.**

**Unfortunately I am not Stephanie Meyer and therefore do not own Twilight. All I own is a rather crummy computer on which I borrow her creations for a while.**

**EsPOV**

It would have been comical had it not saddened me so much. Alice completely ignored her protests and refusals to accept anything from us. I tried, as best I could, to reign her in. I didn't want Bella to feel any more uncomfortable than was necessary but when Alice gets an idea in her head... well, let's just say that every available surface was covered in bowls of flowers and candles and a cake big enough to feed fifty took pride of place in the centre of a table full of presents and cards.

"Alice," I said gently when I saw what she had done. "Bella did say she didn't want us to make a fuss."

"She'll love it!" Alice insisted.

Part of the reason Alice got away with some of her more extravagant decorating was because she could always say that the person for which she was decorating would, 'love it!' and, with her visions, it was difficult to argue with.

In fact, Alice was difficult to argue with full-stop. Around twenty seconds into an argument she'd tell you what the outcome would be. They always seemed to turn out in her favour so you would think we would discredit it. However, in truth, the few times someone had refused to believe her and continued the argument it always turned out exactly as Alice had told it. I have yet to discover whether or not she did ever lie.

"Five minutes!" Alice called, skipping down the stairs pulling Jasper behind her. It always amused me to see my 4'10" little pixie dragging Jasper, who was over six foot tall, along somewhere. Jasper felt my amusement and smiled at me.

Carlisle, Emmett and Rosalie were stood in the living room already when I entered behind Alice and Jasper. Rosalie, I noticed, looked both bored and annoyed. I couldn't really expect anything different. My attempt to request she be civil on Bella's birthday hadn't worked out so well.

~~~~FLASHBACK~~~~

"Rosalie?"

My eldest daughter was led out on her bed, a copy of Cosmopolitan open in front of her.

"Ever heard of knocking?" She asked rudely.

Usually I would have reprimanded her for her callous treatment of me but I was well aware that I would be tiptoeing through a minefield in this conversation and I felt no desire to ignite the wrath my hot tempered daughter prematurely.

I stepped back into the hall, shutting the door behind me, and knocked.

"Come in." Rosalie's surprise at my actions was evident both in her voice and on her face; I decided it was a good start that she had at least looked up at me this time.

I went to sit beside Rosalie on the bed and peered over her shoulder. "That's nice." I said indicating the dress she was looking at.

Rosalie shut the magazine and sat up, cross legged on the bed, glaring at me. "You didn't come in here to read my magazine and make small talk. What is it?"

Deciding there was no time like the present I began my carefully prepared little speech, watching her face circumspectly for any signs that she was about to erupt.

"Alice is downstairs at the moment decorating the living room for Bella's birthday party tomorrow night." I said quickly. "This means a lot to Alice and, though she said not to make a fuss, I'm sure Bella will enjoy it. So could you please just be civil and..."

"Welcome her with open arms? Call her your majesty?" Rosalie spat. "Why can't any of you get that I don't like her and I never will!"

"No-one's saying you have to like her Rosalie, just-"

"NO!" She yelled. "Just because all your lives revolve around that stupid human now doesn't mean mine has to!"

Saying so she flung the magazine at me and stormed out of the room.

~~~~END FLASHBACK~~~~

Needless to say I was rather wary. As we heard Bella and Edward coming up the drive to the house I mouthed, 'Be nice'. She simply glared. I sighed. It was going to be a long night.

**This is my first fan-fic that's not a one shot so reviews would be much appreciated. Love it, Hate it? Please tell me. Thanks, Annie**


	2. Blood

**Once again I am not Stephenie Meyer, just a girl who has nothing better to do with her Thursday evenings.**

**NOTE: I am going to use other points of view put at the moment I am enjoying this in Esme's so it's going to stay that way for the next chapter or two.**

**EsPOV**

The first noise I heard was a low moan from Bella. Across the room Alice smirked.

"_I have a question."_ I heard Bella say. _"If I develop this film will you show up in the picture?"_

All the family joined Edward in laughter. It amazed me how many false there were of our kind and everyone found it hilarious when Bella asked about one of them, like the other day with Alice.

~~~~FLASHBACK~~~~

Bella was around at our house so frequently these days that Emmett often joked she should just move in already. As such we had begun to keep our cupboards stocked with food for her.

I was passing by the kitchen where Bella was cooking spaghetti bolognaise, a particularly repulsive smelling dish, with Alice perched on the counter.

"That smells vile." Alice said, voicing my thoughts.

"It tastes good." Bella responded.

"If you say so."

As I walked away I heard a squeal and turned round into the kitchen quickly.

"What happened?" I asked worriedly

Alice stood in front of the counter her tongue hanging out. "It wen in ma mouf." She explained flapping her hands in front of her face. Beside her Bella looked like she was about to have a panic attack.

"Alice! Alice, I'm so sorry! Are you OK?"

Alice pulled her tongue back in but still looked disgusted. "I'm fine."

"Really?" Bella asked sounding scared. "Doesn't it hurt?"

Alice's expression changed from repugnance to confusion, "Why on Earth would you think it hurt?"

I suddenly burst out laughing. "Oh Bella! Surely you didn't think..."

"Didn't think wh-"Alice interrupted herself with a fit of giggles.

Bella glared. "Well how was I supposed to know?" She growled throwing the garlic crusher in the sink.

~~~~END FLASHBACK~~~~

Emmett still greeted Bella saying, 'You don't have any garlic do you?' so I would have thought she'd be more careful in hearing distance of him, one look at his face let me know he was going to have some fun with this one.

As they entered we broke out in a chorus of, "Happy Birthday Bella!" causing her to blush and look to the floor.

I was closest to the door and moved quickly to her, keen to relieve some of her embarrassment, I hugged her gently and kissed her forehead as Carlisle put an arm over her shoulders and apologised for Alice.

A glance at Rosalie told me she wasn't smiling, obviously not happy, but it was a good sign that she wasn't glaring, scowling or anything similar.

"You haven't changed at all, I expected a perceptible difference, but here you are red-faced just like always."

I shook my head at my 'eldest' son as Bella's cheeks reddened further.

Emmett headed out the back door as Alice skipped towards Bella, grabbing her hand to tow her towards the present table.

I sighed as Alice declared her ignorance of every one of Bella's requests and thrust a gift into her reluctant hands. "Open it."

Bella complied and then stared in confusion at the empty box it contained. "Um...Thanks."

Jasper and Carlisle laughed, Edward grinned, Alice giggled, Rosalie actually allowed her cold demeanour to slip for a second and I smiled warmly at my future daughter's politeness.

"It's a stereo for your truck." Jasper told her. "Emmett's installing it right now so that you can't return it."

Bella seemed unsure as to whether she should be annoyed or pleased and eventually settled on a smile.

Alice barely gave her time to thank Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie before pushing her own present at Bella.

"Open mine and Edward's next!" She trilled, giddy with excitement.

Bella turned to Edward with a ferocious glare, "You promised!" She accused.

"I didn't spend a dime." Edward smiled brushing her hair from her face.

I glowed in happiness at this as Bella turned to take the gift from Alice and slid her finger under the wrapping to open it.

They say things happen in slow motion when there's a disaster. For me it seemed there was barely half a second between the warm happy atmosphere of the party and the acknowledgment of Jasper flying across the room. As I inhaled my nostrils filled with the scent of blood as I reached a cold sense of realization, my son was about to kill my daughter.

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I'm not sure how it turned out so please review! **


	3. Near Fatal

**If I owned Twilight I would be somewhere warm and sunny writing million pound novels, not writing fan fiction in my house in England, where it's raining, again.**

**EmPOV**

I briefly wondered why Jasper was running across the living room, I'd lost track of the amount of times Esme had yelled at me for running in the house, before I smelled it. Blood. I barrelled across the room slamming straight into Jasper and holding him tight from behind.

Now, my brothers and I play fight all the time but these friendly wrestling sessions could not have prepared me for Jasper's strength when the entirety of his being was consumed by an overpowering desire for blood. Even the combined efforts of me and Edward were only just enough to hold him stationary in his current, thrashing state; it's a harrowing experience to have your own brother trying to take a snap out of your neck.

"Emmett, Rose, get Jasper outside." Carlisle said quietly.

I nodded, "Come on Jasper." I began to drag him outside, helped by Rose, who looked undeniably smug about the whole situation. I glanced at her and she dropped the smirk.

With great difficulty we forced Jasper through the glace door that Esme help open with one hand, the other clamped firmly across the bottom half of her face. I heard her wail an apology to Bella as she moved rapidly to join us in the yard.

Away from the smell of the blood Jasper was beginning to regain some of his composure. His eyes lost their distant look and his thrashing slowed until eventually he stood motionless.

For a few moments, no one moved. We stood looking at each other trying to comprehend how, in the space of mere seconds; a happy occasion had turned into a near fatal one.

"Jasper?" Esme's gentle inquiry was enough to release Jasper from his frozen state. Pulling his arms free of our loosened grasps he took off running into the forest.

Esme made to follow him but I took her arm lightly. "Let him go calm down Mom."

My use of this maternal term seemed to sooth her slightly as she stood staring into the forest. I

The door opened and Edward came out. "She'll be okay," he said in a clipped tone, before heading after Jasper.

Alice came flying out of the house a few seconds later, but barely seemed to notice our existence before pelting towards the trees.

"See!" Rosalie snapped viciously when she was gone. "That's why we shouldn't get all friendly with humans! I _told_ you all this would happen but you were all too wrapped up in making '_Princess Bella_' happy that-"

"_Rosalie_!" Esme gasped.

"Rose, just leave it yeah?" I pleaded. Great, this was exactly what we did _not_ need. Rosalie jumping down everyone's throats about how she was right all along.

I glanced nervously towards the forest, praying that Jasper would be alright. I could hear Carlisle's voice coming from the kitchen. He was telling Bella about all his religious God and Heaven stuff. I wasn't into all that, not that it mattered that much in any case, I was a vampire and it shouldn't be that hard to just live forever.

Alice and Edward emerged, at last from the trees. "He needs some time alone." Alice explained as the both headed inside.

"I should go clean up." Esme murmured, drifting in after them.

I turned to Rose. "You don't really think this is a good thing do you?"

She looked shocked, the one reaction I had not anticipated. "No! You think I want her to die?"

"Well..." I said awkwardly.

"Emmett! That's exactly what I _don't_ want! Can't you see? She's human; she has a whole life in front of her. I don't want her to die, I want her to _live_! I want her to have all the things I never can." The end of this speech came out in a wail and I wrapped my arms around her.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think." I felt horrible now for having assumed the reasons for Rosalie's dislike of Bella as being no more complex than her annoyance at having someone know our secret. I was glad there was more to it than that.

I heard Edward's car pull off down the driveway. Well, I mused. That just took the title of crappiest eighteenth birthday ever!

**Well there we go. This chapter took ages to write, it's such a crucial scene in the book and I was trying so hard to do justice to the genius that is Stephenie Meyer so please tell me how you thought I did.**

**Annie**


	4. Decision

**Me: Can I own Twilight?**

**SM: No**

**Me: Please?**

**SM: No **

**Me: Pretty, pretty please?**

**SM: NO!**

**Me *sighs* Well, it was worth a shot**

**Yes, I know I'm horrible for not updating for so long, I hope it's even a little bit worth the wait.**

**EdPOV**

I stroked her hair and stared down at her sleeping face. She was beautiful. I never wanted to leave her. My heart felt as though it was tearing in two, the memory of Jasper's face twisted and distorted out of recognition from thirst etched into my memory.

I jumped from the bed and clamped my hand over my mouth, thinking of thirst sat beside Bella was obviously not a good idea.

'_That's why you have to do this.'_

'_But I love her.'_

'_What's more important, her safety or your love?'_

The internal battle caused me near physical pain. I wanted so much to be selfish, to say that my love was more important, but I knew deep down that I couldn't. I saved her from James, it was my stupidity that made him come after her but he was 'the bad guy', he was evil, I was the hero, protecting the princess.

How though, could I justify being her knight in shining armour, her protector, when it was my brother who tried to kill her? I had to save her, even if saving her meant tearing my unbeating heart to shreds.

"Edward?" Her eyelids fluttered open and I ran swiftly back to the bed and lay carefully down next to her. I brushed her hair out of her face smiled, kissed her forehead and ducked out of the window. I ran home thinking.

_I could just leave now._

_You can't just disappear, you have to say goodbye._

_It'll be easier this way._

_She needs closure to move on with her life._

_But it's too hard..._

Before the war in my head could reach a conclusion I was assaulted by a tiny pixie streaming down from the house.

"EDWARD ANTHONY CULLEN! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" Saying so Alice, my tiny happy little sister Alice, lunged at me violently and began to pummel me with her little fists. "She's my best friend Edward! I love her as much as you do! I _won't_ leave her. I _won't_!"

I could easily have fought her off but my surprise at this change in Alice's usually so cheerful personality rendered me motionless and I just stood still, taking the beating as Jasper ran towards us. He wrapped his arms around her waist and attempted to pull her off of me but she wasn't having any of it.

"Let me GO Jasper!" She screeched as she squirmed and struggled so hard that Jasper, despite being more than a foot taller and theoretically a lot stronger, had a hard time keeping hold.

"_She won't even let me calm her down. I don't know what you did Edward but you're gonna have hell to pay for it by the looks of things."_

Alice's thoughts were almost too incoherent for me to read. The bits I could pick up on largely consisted of me being ripped to pieces and burnt. I winced.

Emmett came running out of the house, closely followed by rose, Carlisle and Esme, and took a tight hold of Alice. The combined strength of my brothers managed to drag Alice away from me and she turned round and buried her face in Jasper's shoulder. Jasper glared at me over the top of her head as he caressed her back comfortingly.

"_What did you do to hurt my Alice so much?" _He thought bitterly.

"_What the hell dude?"_

"_Edward? What happened?"_

"_Brilliant, he's been so stupid that he's got the pixie attacking him."_

"_What's happened? Why's Alice so upset? Edward, are you alright?" _

"_I am going to KILL you if you make me leave Bella!"_

I walked towards the house, head down, not ready to face them yet but Carlisle put a hand on my shoulder. I tried to push past but he was much stronger than me and I gave up quickly.

"_Edward, what happened? It takes a lot to push Alice to violence."_

I didn't answer. The front yard was silent save Alice's dry sobbing and the rush of cars on the distant highway that we could all hear as clearly as if we were stood right next to it.

"Edward, what's going on?" Carlisle posed his question out loud this time and it was Alice who answered, lifting her face just long enough to wail,

"He's going to leave her, and make us leave too!" before burrowing back into Jasper's chest.

"Is this true?" I looked at the ground and stayed quiet.

"_Edward, look at me. Is this true?"_

I forced by eyes up from the ground and looked into my father's face. "It's not safe for her. It's for her own good."

Alice screeched and attempted to launch herself at me again but my brother's were prepared this time and restrained her.

"_I'm sorry. It's all my fault."_

I shook my head at Jasper. "It's not your fault it's mine. I shouldn't have let myself get so close to her."

I walked into the house and the last thing I heard before the door banged shut and I took off to my room and the comfort of Debussy, was Alice's mournful cry as she realised I hadn't changed my mind.

**As usual, please review. Thanks, Annie**


	5. Would You?

**I bought the rights to Twilight last night! How amazing is that? Unfortunately I woke up again...**

**EmPOV**

I lay with Rosie on our bed playing with her stunning golden hair as she read. I snuggled closer to her and began to kiss her neck. She put down her book and turned into me as I kissed her mouth and moved my hands to her blouse.

She took a hold of my wrists and pulled back, "Emmett?"

I frowned, talking was not really at the top of my agenda at the moment, but then I saw her face, heartbreakingly miserable. "What is it baby?"

"Do you think he's doing the right thing?"

"Who?"

She pushed herself up on to her elbow. "Edward. Do you think he's doing the right thing?"

I put my hands behind my head and sighed. "I think he's doing it for the right reasons." I responded eventually.

"That wasn't the question."

"I know."

She put her head on my chest and I ran my fingers through her hair. We stayed this way in silence for a moment before Rosalie spoke again.

"Emmett?"

"Yes."

"Would you do it?"

"Would I do what?"

"If I were human, would you leave me?"

I sighed again, of all the questions.

"I won't ever have to make that decision."

"But if you did."

"Just be glad I don't."

"But what if I _was_ human. Would you stay or would you go?"

Damn it she was stubborn.

"Will you just let it go love?"

"No."

I thought for a second then replied, "It would depend on how much danger you were in."

"If it was the same as Bella."

"How much is that?"

"Emmett, would you stop avoiding the question!"

I sat up and took her in my arms kissing the top of her head. "I would put your safety above my love for you any day."

"So you think he's doing the right thing?" She asked, returning to the original question.

"For Bella's safety, without a doubt, for her heart, well, this could be the most stupid thing he's done for a hundred years."

**That was just a little filler chapter while I work on the next proper one but I hope you enjoyed it. As always please review, Annie**


	6. Rip My Heart To Shreds

**I'm so so sorry that I haven't updated in, like forever, I could type out a billion excuses but you probably don't want to read them so I'll just get on with the story and sorry again.**

**Me: Do I have to say it?**

**Random Stranger: Yes**

**Me: Do I**_** have**_** to?**

**Random Stranger: *nods* Just say it fast**

**Me: Idon'. *looks as if about to cry* There, I said it. Are you happy now?**

**Random Stranger: Yes**

**EdPOV**

For the most part they left me alone. Every now and then, one of them would fix to ask me how I was, stick their head around the door and be backing off rapidly with one look at my sullen face.

The first person to pluck up the courage to approach me, after being on my own for hours on end, was Esme. I think I knew it was always going to be Esme, she was my mother in every way that mattered and couldn't bear to see any one of her children upset, but part of me wished that it was Emmett or Jasper. I didn't really want to talk about and Esme wouldn't let it go until I did.

"_I'll have to be careful, approach the subject gently, don't go full on into, 'Can you bear to leave Bel'-Oh damn, he can read my thoughts."_

I chuckled slightly as Esme knocked on the door, but opened it without waiting for an answer, probably fearing I'd send her away before she even got a chance to see how I was doing.

She approached tentatively; her caramel hair swinging around her shoulders, and came to a stop beside me.

"_Just talk Esme. Come on, he's your son, you can talk to him. Oh, he looks so sad. I can't bear to see him this way. How can this be the right choice if it makes him look like this?"_

I looked up at her, concern etched on her face.

"Esme," I said, or more croaked, words seemed alien to me at the moment. "My pain is less important than her safety."

If it were possible tears would have been streaming down Esme's face as she sat beside me and threw her arms around me.

"Never say that! You _are_ important Edward!"

"Not as important as Bella, and infinitely less vulnerable."

I could see Esme's face struggle for an argument, dozens of incoherent thoughts flying around in her mind.

I hugged her briefly, then stood up.

"Bella is the most important thing to me in this world and that is why I have to do this. I left quickly, before I could witness the pain that I knew would come to her face at my words.

I walked out the front door and to my Volvo, on course to rip my heart to shreds.

**I was going to do Edward leaving Bella but it kept coming out almost identical to the book and why meddle with perfection?**


	7. When She's Sixty Four

**This is another short chapter but I hope you enjoy it!**

**This is Stephanie Meyer's sandbox; I'm just playing in it.**

**CPOV**

The front door slammed and I looked out of my office window to see my first son heading for his car. I sighed. Could this really be the best choice?

Before I could come to a conclusion, there was a knock on the door and, without waiting for an answer, my tiny pixie like daughter stepped through.

"You're going to let him." She accused, it was clear in her tone that this wasn't a question.

"What else can I do?" I responded with a sigh.

"Fight against him, persuade him, at least let me stay." The end of this came out pleadingly. "How can we all abandon her?"

"We've had to move for everyone in the past; don't you think the same courtesy should be extended to your brother?"

"That was different!" Alice exploded. "When we moved before all we left was a house. How can you compare that to leaving Bella? To not only taking away her true love, but her family, a whole life that she has chosen!"

"Alice," I said firmly. "Please calm down. I will not have this discussion with you if you yell. Edward thinks this is for the best and we stick by our family."

Alice's eyes filled with tears that could never fall, her voice came out barely more than a whisper, "Bella's family too."

I took my daughter in my arms and let her dry sob into my shoulder as I rubbed her back softly.

"Shhh," I soothed. "It'll be OK."

"But it's stupid!"Alice wailed. "He'll come back anyway! He _knows _he'll come back, he's seen it in my thoughts, yet the selfish ass still insists on leaving!"

"Well, if we're coming back anyway does it matter all that much?" I reasoned, allowing her language to slide this once, I felt she had full reason to call her brother an ass at the moment.

"I don't know when. Sometimes it's weeks, sometimes months, sometimes years." She looked up at me, fear in her wide gold eyes. "Carlisle," She said quietly, "what if we come back when she's much older, say thirty two, she won't have any time for an eternal sixteen year old."

I lay my hands on her shoulders and looked into her face. "Alice, how could _anyone_ nothave time for you, let alone Bella? You mark my words sweetheart, we could come back when she's sixty four and she'd still love you just as much as she does now."

"Are you sure?" Alice asked

"Positive." I replied with a slight smile.

**I hope you enjoyed this little bit of father/daughter bonding between Alice and Carlisle, hopefully I will get another chapter or two up before I go away on Thursday so keep an eye out for them. As always, please review! Thanks, Annie**


	8. Maybe

**Maybe if I wish hard enough on a star tonight I will own Twilight, until then though, it's all Stephanie Meyer's**

**JPOV**

It was all my fault. No matter what Edward or anyone else said, I was the one who almost killed her. It was all my fault.

Rosalie glared at me across the room. "Jasper, for God's sake would you stop making me feel guilty! You've been screwing everyone up with guilt for _days_,just get over it already!"

I returned her glare. "Rosalie, I came _this_ close to killing my brother's girlfriend and my wife's best friend and you want me to 'just get over it'?"

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Great, now I feel mad_ and_ guilty."

I wasn't in the mood for an argument with my 'twin' so I tried hard to pull my guilt and anger back from her. This plan, however, was thwarted when I felt Rosalie's true emotions rolling off of her in waves. Satisfaction.

"Satisfied!?!" I yelled. "Bella almost died, Edward's depressed and you're _satisfied_?"

"Immensely." Rosalie hissed.

I lunged at her. This was not like when I play fought with my brothers. I was furious and i was just about ready to kill my heartless cow of a sister.

We wrestled on the floor, each gaining the upper hand at different times, oblivious to the various crashes and bangs around us that signalled the destruction of the living rom. It barely registered as we crashed through the large window and continued to fight in the rose bushes below, our hair and clothes covered in earth and shards of glass.

I was on top of Rosalie, going for her neck as she deftly blocked my assaults with her arms, when I felt a pair of strong arms wrap around my waist and the ground disappear from beneath my feet and began to fight vigorously against my captor. Opposite me I saw Rosalie in a similar position, Carlisle's arms locked around her.

"Jeez bro, calm down." Emmett said, tightening his hold.

Esme and Alice came flying out of the house, identical looks of horror on their faces. Edward stayed in his room despite having obviously heard everything and knowing full well that we were fighting about him.

Alice ran straight to my side. "Jazzykins, are you OK?"

Under any other circumstances this nickname would have caused me great embarrassment and the others amusement, as it was, we all just stood there, Rosalie struggling in vain against our father's iron tight grip.

"I'm fine love." I managed eventually.

"Rose, baby, are you all right?"

"I'll be better when I can kill that damn empath!" Rosalie spat, making another futile attempt for freedom.

"Rosalie!" Esme gasped. "Don't say that about your brother!"

Rosalie and I both opened our mouths to respond but Carlisle beat us both to it.

"Look, I think we all just need to calm down. I know the tensions been high this last week and to be honest I'm surprised no one resorted to physical violence sooner. I think we all just need to find something to take our minds off of things and stop us getting under each other's feet."

"Like what?" Alice asked miserably.

I reached my arms out to my wife, whose features were so twisted in pain that I could barely stand it, and Emmett's arms instinctively tightened around me.

"I won't hurt Rose," I promised and he released me.

I moved to hug Alice but was surprised when she ducked away from me.

"You can comfort me _after _you've washed. This is a brand new Louis Vuitton dress," She explained.

My Alice's ridiculous fashion obsession managed to raise a laugh. It was half-hearted and full of sorrow but it was the first time any of us had laughed in over a week, the first time any emotion had penetrated, even for a moment the gloom of regret, sadness and heartache that I had felt from every member of the household, even Rosalie, and it was a turning point.

It was a sign that maybe; just maybe, we could all get through this.

**Well there you have it, two updates in one day! I hope you enjoyed it. Please review, love it or hate it I want to know. Thanks, Annie.**


	9. Mile High

**I'd like to say thank you to, ****Electrical storm 1996**** and ****jenie16788**** who have reviewed almost every chapter, I'm glad you're enjoying the story and I hope the rest of 'Full Moon' doesn't disappoint.**

**Just a silly little thing about Emmett being, well Emmett, on the way to Europe.**

**EmPOV**

I was impatient to get off the plane. Actually, impatient was an understatement. Being cooped up on a plane for hours on end was really not my idea of fun.

"Rose, I'm bored."

"Shut up Emmett."

"Are we nearly there yet Rose?"

"Shut up Emmett."

"Rose, I can't think of anything to do."

"Shut _up _Emmett."

After this she had put headphones on and started to watch some stupid chick flick, this had been two hours ago and I was even more bored than I had been before.

As the movie ended and Rosalie removed her headphones I fake yawned and put an arm around her shoulders.

"Fancy joining the mile high club baby?"

She looked up at me furiously, "Don't even think about it Emmett Cullen."

"Aww, Rose, why not? We've done it in cars, janitors closets, on tables, on Eddie's piano, the mile high club is pretty much all we have left."

Oops, I hadn't realised how loudly I was talking, almost the entire plane was staring at us. Damn Rose was gonna kill me! I looked down at my wife; if she were human she would have been blushing a thousand shades of red. She glared at me, "You are so dead Emmett!" She hissed at vampire speed before putting the headphones back on.

I looked over at one couple who were staring at us and grinned, "We're on our honeymoon, she's still a little shy, she'll come round."

Rosalie growled, as they looked startled and turned away quickly, and I laughed softly, I wasn't quite so bored now, but if only she'd said yes...

**As I said before, this is just a silly little chapter because I wanted to get something up before I go away but I hope you enjoyed it. Please review, Annie **


	10. Musings

**This site is called **_**fan**_**fiction**__**which kind of suggests that I am a **_**fan**_** and therefore don't own Twilight.**

**CPOV**

It was difficult to define exactly what Bella had meant to us, what Bella _still_ meant to us.

I loved her. I did not love her like one of my own; the like was no longer applicable, my love for her had surpassed the stage of being a simile, it simply was.

And I did not love her because of Edward. I had met her because of Edward, but I loved Bella because of Bella. I loved her honesty, her genuinely kind and caring nature. I loved that she didn't judge us, not for what we were or for what we have done; she loved each and every one of us despite our imperfections.

Heck, she even loved Rosalie who had been depraved to her from the very start. She seemed simply to accept the explanations Edward offered her for Rosalie's despicable behaviour as valid and, once again, she didn't judge her for it.

Having lived a life of being judged constantly, by both humans and vampires, Bella's complete and utter acceptance of what we were and how we lived with it was a new and invigorating concept.

To have lost her, to have lost a member of our family, as none of us could help but think of her, was difficult to comprehend and even harder to accept.

**Nothing really happened in this chapter but I think it's kind of important to show how much she means to the Cullens. Please review! Annie**


	11. Expectations

**If I owned Twilight there would be much more Jasper and Alice and Jacob would have been hit by a bus. As this did not happen I think you can safely assume that I do not own Twilight.**

**Sorry for another chapter of nothing actually happening.**

**JPOV**

I wish I had been stronger, and therefore could have got to know her better, because it was strange to feel such an aching pain at the absence of someone you spent all the time you were in their presence trying desperately not to kill.

But then Bella was strange, not exactly in a bad way, though her attraction for anything and everything dangerous was something we could all live without, and the emotions and reactions to these emotions that she ignited in all of us were different to anything I had ever experienced before.

Bella's own emotions, too, were hard for even me to understand. She never reacted to anything in the ways you would expect. Her entire being seemed to repel any normal, and in fact _sane_, response to any situation.

Take, for example, her birthday party. To be entirely honest any normal human, actually, any human that was not Isabella Swan, would probably have run screaming long before that point but, even if they had made it that far, the way they felt would have been almost a polar opposite to how Bella felt.

Her boyfriend's brother had almost killed her over a paper cut and her boyfriend had shoved her into a table full of glass. As she sat on the floor covered in blood looking up at the six _monsters_ who wanted to drink it her emotions should have simple. Terror, we were _vampires_ for the love of God! , rage, that the one who said he loved her had allowed this to happen, and pain, well, she was covered in glass after all.

But no, Bella sat on the living room floor of a family of vampires, dripping in blood, emitting calm, love, understanding and, perhaps most bizarrely of all, forgiveness.

Even as her life still hung in the balance, even as my control over myself was still questioned, she understood my reaction and she forgave me for it.

Although, maybe I was wrong before. Maybe forgiveness, whilst strange in her predicament, was not as strange as love.

I tried to kill her and she still loved me. She loved us all despite everything. She loved Edward despite his overprotective idiocy, Alice despite her insane obsession with shopping, Rosalie despite her bitchiness, and she loved me despite my weakness that almost ended her life.

But after all, Bella never reacted as you would expect.

**Sorry for another chapter of nothing actually happening but I enjoy writing about feelings and things like that so just bear with me and hopefully it will become more interesting in later chapters. Please review! Thank you, Annie**


	12. Hunting Victoria

**So sorry for the long wait! Hope you enjoy the chapter.**

**I do not own anything, even this computer I'm stealing from my Dad for a bit!**

The wind was howling through the trees, lashing against my legs, chest and face, the rain pounding heavily against me.

If I were human I would have passed out from the cold hours ago, standing in shorts as I was in this storm as I was. But, being what I am, I could keep up my vigil by this cliff, waiting for Victoria to pass as I had seen in her thoughts she would.

It was only as the storm began to clear and the only water hitting the ground was dripping from my hair, that I remembered something important, you could lie with your thoughts.

I let out a roar that echoed off of the cliffs all around me. I was so used to seeing exactly what would happen in Alice's thoughts that I had overlooked this one crucial detail. I had thought my talent to be, if annoying at times, powerful. I had never realised until now just how much I relied on my sister. Or how much I would miss her if she wasn't there.

Hunting Victoria had been harder than I had ever thought it could be. James had made tracking seem so easy and I had seen all of his techniques in his mind. I had thought it would be simple. I had been sadly mistaken. I had spent weeks chasing Victoria all over the USA, and past the border into Mexico on one occasion, only to lose her now, due to my own sheer stupidity, at the Canadian border line in Pennsylvania.

I found myself unconsciously calculating how long it would take to run to Washington, to Forks, to Bella. I quickly forced that thought out of my mind. Thinking of Bella, or anything to do with Bella, made my heart ache, I had wasted a good bit of time whilst chasing Victoria down to Mexico running around Arizona instead of through.

I now considered my options. I could follow her into Canada, but the storm would have washed away her scent and I'd be running blind, having no idea where to go. I could run through Canada and visit the Denali's, pick up the chase later. I could head down to Iowa and check in with my family. The one thing I could not do now, could never do again, was the one thing I wanted to do the most.

**Please review! **

**Annie**


	13. Of Dark And Red Dresses

Three Months Later

EsPOV

Nothing had really improved. Much had changed defiantly and, on the outside maybe, we all seemed alright, Carlisle worked, Alice shopped, I built, Jasper learned, Rosalie fixed the cars and Emmett, well, Emmett did whatever Emmett did. Only Edward's sweet compositions were missing from this external display of normal life.

But, for all these outward appearances, I knew that each and every one of us was falling apart. After so many years of hiding who and what we were, we Cullen's were all quite gifted with concealing our true emotions, displaying a peripheral facade, so different from the true interior, that it was almost an entirely different person.

The front door slammed close and I went quickly down to see what had provoked this latest attack on this house, I refused to think of it as a home, for me home was still Forks and nowhere else.

Alice stood in the hall, around 15 bags from a variety of different, equally expensive, stores hanging from her small arms. It looked like she'd been about to take her coat off, the top three or four buttons were undone, but now she was just standing there, staring into space.

I hurried down the stairs quickly but softly. I stood alongside her and, for a few minutes neither of us moved or spoke, but then Alice began to mutter, "No, No, No..."

Worried, I touched her shoulder gently. "Alice?"

She jumped and turned to look at me.

"What do you see?" I asked softly, not entirely sure I wanted to know the answer. The look of pain that flashed through her dark onyx eyes confirmed my suspicions. Even still, I asked again. "Alice?"

"Nothing." She replied.

I raised my eyebrows. Did she truly expect me to believe that? "Alice..."

She was shaking her head rapidly. "No, I really see nothing! Just glimpses, mostly it's black, just black. If it wasn't for those tiny visions of commonplace things that don't tell me anything I'd almost think she'd _died_."

My unbeating heart grew cold at her words. "Nothing?"

She shook her head, "Nothing," She verified. "Just black. Just black."

I steered her towards the sofa and we sat down. I held her in my arms as she sobbed against my shoulder. As she calmed down she looked up at me and began to talk nineteen to the dozen.

"I wasn't keeping tabs on her Esme, not really, I swear. But I still _see_. Though now I don't _really_ see. I just see her doing routine things, eating, going to school, nothing that lets me tell how she's actually coping. And if I _do_ try and see how she is, and I know Edward doesn't want me to but she's my best friend and I'm sorry, I truly am, but I need to know whether she's alright, even if I can't do anything and..."

Alice buried her face back in my shoulder and continued to mumble something incoherent.

I rubbed her back comfortingly. "Alice, of course you want to know how she is. She meant, she _still_ means," I amended hastily, appalled at myself for this slip. "A lot to you as well as Edward. Don't be sorry, you have every right to check that she's okay."

"But I don't know is she is," Alice wailed.

"Well, you see glimpses, that means she's alive. That has to be good, right?"

"I don't _know_!" She cried, clinging to me like a life raft. I tightened my arms around her and began a soothing rocking motion, as I inwardly cursed my son for doing this to us. 'For the best in the end' my ass!

"Shhh, honey," I comforted her softly. "It's alright. It'll be alright." For some obscure reason, unbeknownst even to myself I began to sing, 'Three Little Birds' by Bob Marley. I heard Alice giggle slightly and pulled back to look at her.

"I don't know whether to be pleased you're smiling or offended that you find my singling so amusing!" I exclaimed in mock annoyance, though the former was undoubtedly correct.

She smirked and I kissed her forehead lightly. "Maybe we just need a change of scene," I suggested. "Cornell's spring break is coming up and Emm and Rose will be back from Europe. What do you say we go up to the Denali's?"

I tried to keep my tone cheerful, as though I actually believed a change of scene would help and Alice smiled gratefully at my efforts to cheer her up and nodded.

"I think that's a great idea," She responded.

I smiled back. "Are you sure you're alright sweetheart?"

She nodded, "I'm fine. And Jasper will be back in 67 seconds so I'm gonna go put this shopping away." She hugged me once more, "Thank you." She said, before dancing away, pausing by the door.

"Oh, and Esme?"

"Yes?"

"Carlisle's coming home early. He wants you to wear the red dress."

She grinned and disappeared as I shook my head, laughing lightly, at her casual mention of her parent's love life, and then headed upstairs to hunt down the red dress and await my husband's return.

**There we go! I hope you enjoyed it. Please review! Thank you.**

**Annie**


	14. Mary Alice Brandon

**Unfortunately, Stephanie Meyer has not put the rights to Twilight on E-Bay yet but I'll keep checking. Until then, it's all hers.**

CPOV

Everyone wanted to ask but no one could quite manage to find the words. The silence was overwhelming but I don't think Alice even noticed it. I met Esme's eye across the room and the look she gave me was easy to read, _'Why won't she tell us what she's found?'_

It was Tanya who voiced what we were all thinking. "Well? What have you found?"

"Mary Alice Brandon." Alice replied softly.

We all looked at her in confusion.

"My name," she explained. "Mary Alice Brandon, I was born in Biloxi, Mississippi. My little sister was Cynthia Anne Brandon, my parents..."

She trailed off here, and Esme rested a hand on her shoulder. For the first time since she'd came in she lifted her head from the stack of papers and looked at us.

"I knew I'd been in an asylum, ever since that day with James, but to have all the information in front of me, to have it confirmed... it just hurts. I guess there was a part of me that still hoped it had been a mistake. That I'd had parent's who cared about me." If she'd been human, the tears would have been streaming down her face. Though if she'd been human she wouldn't have all of this to deal with in the first place.

Alice picked up two pieces of paper from the stack in front of her. "This is my admission sheet to the asylum," she said, indicating one paper. "It says I was admitted due to, 'Disturbing falsities that have taken on a sense of reality for the patient in question. She is deemed unfit to be around society.'"

I growled softly. Alice's human parents should feel damned lucky that I couldn't get to them. Unfit to be around society! I hadn't known Alice when she was human and she could remember it but she can't have been much different to how she was now. There wasn't one negative thing you could say about her. How could they? How _could_ they?

Esme had wrapped her arms around Alice and she kissed the top of her head. "You have us now sweetheart. It's all alright."

Alice bit her lip. "It gets worse," She warned.

What could possibly be worse than that? We soon found out.

"I was admitted to the asylum on May 22nd 1920. I was fifteen."

"Fifteen?" Esme exploded. "They sent their _fifteen_ _year old_ daughter to that place?"

Alice nodded, "But that's not what I meant when I said it gets worse."

We looked at her anxiously, wondering what other horrors she could have dug up.

"This one's my death certificate," she said, pointing to the other piece of paper. "It says, 'Mary Alice Brandon. Born March 14th 1905. Died May 22nd 1920."

It took me a few seconds to make the connection, and when I did I felt my heart grow cold.

They would have rather she died. They would have rather she died. My Alice. My daughter. They would have preferred her _dead_.

The pure rage against these heartless, cruel people was hard to curb. I wanted to scream, to destroy something. More specifically, to destroy them. I wanted to avenge my daughter for the pain she was put through, both then and now. I was shocked at the tone of my thoughts. I was not one to wish any kind of hurt upon anybody, much less to long to be the one to cause it, but the sight of my tiny Alice, crying into her husband's chest, was enough to banish my pacifist tendencies.

For a long moment no one spoke. The silence punctuated only by Alice's soft sobs. It was Tanya, again, who broke it.

"Whoa, girl. That's rough."

Alice moved her head back slightly from Jasper and nodded. "I've spent my whole life wondering what my human life was like. What my human parents were like. And now I've found out about it, I just discover that they couldn't give a damn about me!"

She began to cry again and mine and Esme's arms reached her at the same moment. As we held her she continued to talk through her sobs.

"I couldn't find out much about them, their engagement was announced, and Cynthia's but we weren't a rich or powerful family so there wasn't much else. I can't remember a single thing about them either, so the only thing I know is that my parents, the people who were supposed to love me unconditionally, slung me in an asylum and pretended I'd died when I was fifteen. I know it wouldn't make any difference now but I just wish I could have parents who _cared_!"

I placed a finger under her chin and lifted her head up so she was looking me in the eyes.

"But Alice, honey, you _do_ have parents who care. Esme and I care about you and your siblings more than anything else in the world."

Esme nodded her agreement, "_We_ love you unconditionally, Alice. Like you said, they should have done and they didn't. But we do. I know it must hurt to think that they could have done that to you, but they don't matter. They, and everything they did to you, are in the past. They're not important anymore. What's important is the present. And in the present you are Alice Cullen and you are our daughter and we love you."

Alice cried harder at this and flung her arms around both of us.

"Thank you," she said. "Thank you so much."

I smoothed her dark, spiky hair and kissed her cheek. "I love you Alice."

"I love you too Daddy."

And that's how we were sat, holding our daughter tightly in our arms, when her eyes glazed over and she gasped.

**A little bit of a cliff-hanger for this chapter, though I'm sure you can all guess what she's seen. I hope you enjoyed it, please review and tell me! Thank you.**

**Annie**


	15. Cliff

**Sorry for the wait (again!) but I hope you enjoy this next chapter. **

**Nope, even after fifteen chapters I **_**still **_**don't own Twilight. It's depressing really. I'm gonna go cry.**

APOV

Esme had her hands on my shoulders. I could feel them there but only vaguely. I think she was talking to me but I couldn't hear her and I couldn't see her face either, though I knew it must've been frantic.

I was watching. Watching the same vision over and over again. Watching Bella jump.

How could she do that? What about Charlie? What about Renee? What about us? Did she truly think we didn't care about her enough that it wouldn't hurt us to watch her die? My heart sank as I realised she probably did.

I couldn't believe that I'd been so stupid as to listen to my brother. Not that I didn't love Edward, I did, but damn he could be an idiot. I _told_ him something like this would happen! But then, telling him wasn't enough. I should have fought against his choice, refused to leave. This was just as much my fault as it was his.

I hit the ground with a thud and looked up, shocked. Emmett was stood above me a worried look on his face.

"Sorry sis, but you weren't listening to us." He didn't sound in the least bit repentant.

I now realised why I'd hit the ground, Emmett had kicked my legs out from under me. I stood up and brushed off my skirt. "Well that was hardly necessary." I grumbled.

"Yeah, but it was weird," Rosalie added. "You just stared into space and said Bella over and over."

Bella. The mention of her name brought the vision back and I nearly hit the ground unassisted. Esme grabbed my elbow to steady me. "Alice, what's going on?"

"Bella," Was all I could get out.

Rosalie rolled her eyes, "Yeah, we got that one."

Esme flashed a disapproved look in her direction but didn't say anything, we were all well used to Rosalie's sarcastic, catty comments by this point.

"Alice? Please tell us what's wrong." Carlisle said gently.

"I...She...Jumped..." I couldn't finish.

"She jumped? What do you mean she jumped?" Esme asked fretfully.

I looked at her, barely able to think the words, let alone say them out loud.

"She jumped off a cliff. She's dead."

The silence in the room was more than uncomfortable, it was suffocating. I wanted to say something, but what could I say?

Rosalie recovered first in the most surprising of ways, "Unbe-bloody-levible!" She exclaimed.

"Rose?" Carlisle asked, shocked.

"Another cliff! Is there no other way to commit suicide? I mean come _on_!"

"Rosalie, what are you talking about?" I asked, thoroughly confused.

She pointed to Carlisle, "You jumped off a cliff to kill yourself for being a vampire." She turned to Esme, "You jumped off a cliff because your son died and now Bella! What is it with or family and god-damned cliffs?"

Now, I guessed, it kinda made sense, in a weird way, but what shocked me even more now was what she'd said about the god-damned cliffs...

"Our family?"

Rosalie looked nervous as everyone turned to her.

"I...Uh...slip of the tongue."

No one believed her.

"I_ knew_ you thought of Bella as one of us!" Esme exclaimed

I gulped slightly. "But does it matter now?"

They all turned slowly to me.

"How long?" Carlisle asked

"Half an hour."

"Is there nothing we can do?"

I shook my head, "The only thing I could possibly do is go to Forks and be there for Charlie."

Jasper was shaking his head before I'd even got the words out, "Alice, you promised Edward you wouldn't go back."

"I never did!" I insisted.

He sighed, "Alice, you did. We all did."

"No, I promised him I wouldn't interfere with Bella. I never said a thing about Charlie _or _Forks."

Jasper rolled his eyes, "You always find the loopholes."

I smiled. "It's a talent."

"Are you sure it's a good idea?" Esme asked concerned.

"Positive."

"I don't think..." Carlisle began

I glared, "If any of you try to stop me going to see Charlie after the death of his daughter, my best friend, then I promise you there will be hell to pay."

Carlisle put his hands up in surrender, "If you're sure it's the right thing to do."

"I am."

"Then take the Mercedes, it's faster."

I threw my arms around him, "Thank you Daddy!"

"Go," he replied.

I didn't need any further encouragement. I flew out the door and to the car as fast as I could. The sole purpose of this trip, I told myself, is to make sure Charlie will come through it okay. But, though I knew it was inane, I couldn't keep myself from trying to see Bella getting out of the water.

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter; I'll try to post the next as soon as possible. Don't forget to review! Thanks! Annie **


	16. Pessimist

**I am so sorry for the ridiculously long wait, but I sat down today and made myself write it so I hope you enjoy.**

**Even after all this time the original and depressing disclaimer still applies. **

APOV

The first thing that hit me when I walked through the door of the Swan residence was the scent, her scent. There were dishes still in the sink, her backpack by the door, an unfinished math sheet on the kitchen table. It seemed just like any other normal day. You'd never have guessed that one of the residents of this house was now, I could barely bring myself to say the word, dead...

I walked slowly to the table and ran my fingers over the Math sheet. It was covered in crossing outs and alterations, usually concluding in exactly the same answer she'd had before. I allowed myself to smile slightly. I could just see Bella doing this sheet, getting more and more flustered. I remembered the times when I'd been there to help her out.

~~~~FLASHBACK~~~~

"Urgh! This is impossible!"

I grinned at my frustrated friend, my completed homework assignments already stacked on the table, Cosmo open in front of me.

"Alice, how in the hell are you supposed to work this out!"

I smiled at her and tapped my nose secretively.

"Aliccccccce!" She whined. "What's the point in having a best friend who knows everything there id to know about high school math if you won't tell me anything!"

"What's the point in having a best friend who gets confused by high school math if I can't tease you about it?" I shot back.

Bella glared at me. I chuckled and lent across the table, pulling her math book towards me. I switched some of the reciprocals and calculated the powers, then pushed the book back to her. "There, now try it."

She looked at it, "So what's 'a' equal to?"

I rolled my eyes, "That's what you're working out Bells."

She sighed and started to mutter to herself, "Well, if d is twenty-eight and x is seventy then a must be...uh...uh...eleven...no...uh...maybe...uh..."

I laughed silently.

"Eleventy-four!" Bella declared.

I looked at her, smirking, "Eleventy? Did you graduate kindergarten?"

She blushed bright red. "I meant seventy-four," She muttered.

I laughed again, "You finished? 'Cause there's this amazing dress here that would look great..."

Bella cut me off with a dramatic groan and I laughed again.

I enjoyed having a friend.

~~~~END FLASHBACK~~~~

Now I dropped the math worksheet back into Bella's bag, feeling phantom tears pooling in my eyes. Bella had been my best friend, my only friend really and now she was gone, and it was all my fault.

Well, okay, so maybe it wasn't _all _my fault, Edward had to shoulder a good deal of the blame I guess, but still, I shouldn't have gone along with him. I could have prevented this.

I walked slowly up the stairs and opened the door to Bella's room. Her scent was even stronger up here, it overwhelmed me completely. I walked inside. The room was so Bella. Mostly neat but with a few blouses hung over the back of her chair and a pile of books by the computer on her desk. ]

Her bed retained an even stronger scent than the rest of the room and I sat down on it, walking my fingers up the comforter to the pillow, and that was when I lost it. I couldn't hold myself together any more. I lay down on her bed, buried my face in her pillow, inhaling her sweet scent, and sobbed.

"I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry!" I sobbed out apologies into Bella's pillow so loudly that I almost didn't hear the car pulling up outside.

I stood up preparing to slip out of the window so I could come through the front door to talk to Charlie when I picked up something strange. Dog.

Charlie must have been hanging out on the rez, I reasoned. But it confused me. It smelt like a proper werewolf, not just one of the Quileute's, but the line had died out with Ephraim Black. Hadn't it?

And then I was even more confused. That was _her _voice.

"Stop it Alice," I scolded myself. "You've been thinking about her for so long that's all. You're imagining things."

Then the vision hit. I was in the hallway, and in front of me, her arms locked around my waist, was Bella.

"Impossible," my inner pessimist insisted, making one of his rare unwelcome appearances. "Your visions have been wrong before Alice."

"I know, but for me to have a vision of it it has to be a possibility," I argued. "And for it to be a possibility then..."

I couldn't allow myself to think the words, to get my hopes up, only to have them come crashing down when a weary Charlie walked through the door to confirm what I already knew, she was gone.

But still...

"_Impossible!_" The pessimist reiterated. "You saw her jump."

"I saw her hug me in in the hallway." I retaliated.

"What if that was a memory?"

"It wasn't!"

"How do you know?"

"I think I know my visions from my memories thank you very much!"

While this internal battle had been going on my feet had been, almost without me noticing, carrying me down to the hallway, to the exact place I'd seen in my vision.

The door opened.

"Don't do it Alice. Don't hope, it'll only make it hurt more."

"Shut _up_!"

This was the last sliver of hope I had and I planned to cling onto it as tightly as I could for as long as it could possibly be conceivable.

A hand fumbled in the darkness and I flicked the light switch on at my end of the hall.

"Ha!" I thought triumphantly, as my inner pessimist retreated once again to his main residence in the darkest corner of my mind.

**I hope you enjoyed this. Please read and review. Thanks, Annie**


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